
...I couldn't fathom him not being here physically but he knew better than I did. I guess in hindsight I was really trying to be strong for me more than him. He was already strong and had been brave his whole life. I went numb. I really believed that he would live well past the doctor's expectancy. That he would grow old with me and we would still crack jokes on one another and that he would still be around to irk my last nerves but he was gone and that was something I never knew I wouldn't be able to come to terms with...
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